Stumptown 2005! This is Stumptown. I wrote about it last year too. Oh jesus. Why am I writing this now? I just found out I have a stupid paper due tomorrow. No, really, it's totally useless. PROCASTINATE PROCASTINATE. Vital Info: I'm Erika Moen, member of political revolutionary group Pants Press. I was just another bourgeosie pig till they kidnapped, brainwashed through inhumane violence, and recruited me to their ranks. I REGRET NOTHING. The Fabulous Leslie and I rode the Greyhound bus from L.A., CA, to Portland, OR for twenty hours. Each way. While assembling minicomics. Basically, we're totally hard kore. The comic we're putting together? Do not ask! I would hate to give away the inter-web's best kept secret! No! You shall not pry from these chaste lips tantalizing tidbits of an upcoming webcomic called D.A.R.C. to be produced by Team Atrox and drawn by your's truly! Just give up now, I promise you'll learn all about it in due time. At this very same greyhound station restaurant Leslie found a pristine 1980s-era box titled "Sweet Love" that contained not one but TWO genuine DOUCHES. If you are from France you prolly think that means we found baths, which is kind of pleasant. But in the US a douche is actually a sick kind of squirt gun for your vagina . $3.99! Oregon has no sales tax! How could I NOT buy it????? Theresa is one of the most interesting artistic... I dunno, bohemian? Is that the right word? Wait, yeah, it is. She's a total modern day Bohemian. Without question her livejournal is one of my top favorite reads. Pants Press was proud to be this years con resident alcoholic table. (Actually Clio, Ian, and Leslie are drinking locally brewed root beer and, uh, something else. I only had the root beer. It was totally awesome) Oh, Patrick Farley. He is my own personal booth babe. Me, Patrick, and Bill Mudron. Would it be unprofessional for me to say that Kris Dresen is really freakin hot? Let's err on the side of caution and just say Dang, can the lady draw! I brought in literally a pound of gummi worms to give away at our table. Oh, I also may have farted in Clio's face. I don't think I did, but she is under the impression that I did, and, well, it is possible. She was sitting down in a chair and I bent over to get something and next thing I know I'm getting accusations hurtled at me like... well, like accusations are hurtling at me! Derek Kirk Kim and... oh fuck, I totally had a conversation with the guy on the right and I cannot remember his name now! Fuck! They're both lovely strapping young men, tho. Clio and Jen Wang compose the Asian Faction of Pants Press. Louis went to circus school in Quebec! He taught me how to stand on his freakin head! This was the coolest tattoo a the convention. Indie Emo Girl Heart-Throb Craig Thompson! Drawing me a laaaaaay-deeeeee. Cos I asked him to. If you ask (or if you're just within ear shot) I'll teach you how to fold origami stars. PLEASE DO NOT EAT THEM. YES, THIS IS A RECURRING ISSUE. Vera Brosgol accepting defeat after I totally spanked her in a game of 'Chuck The Big Ball Around' At the after party. Tim, R. Stevens, Vera and me being utterly engrossed. Shmeslie! Jesse Hamm!! I always type it 'Jessee' and then I have to delete the extra vowel. Goddamnit, I hate him for it. Remember when Jeff Rowland's leg was all kinds of fucked up from that spider bite and we all had to take a million photos of it? While it is Rich's leg this time around, this one's still for you, Mr. Rowland. They're not on speaking terms any more. I am Jack's smug sense of self satisfaction. With highwaters. Next Day! Jen and Dylan getting their lesbo on. We all drew on our place mats. Because we never really matured beyond three years old. Theresa's! Jen's! Bill's! Patrick's! Jenn Manley Lee and Kip Manley (...not pictured. But there in spirit!) just may be two of my most favorite people ever. Oh wait! There he is! In the hat. Hi Kip. Hi Kip in a Hat. Teehee. Jenn is all like 'ooip!'-which is a very Un-Jenn-like state of being, I gotta say. These Case of the Mystery Fake Hair First there was this, which naturally captivated my imagination. Really, it raised more questions that it answered. Where did it come from? Who just LOSES a huge clump of their fake hair? Why would somebody own that hair in the first place? It was fuckin naaaaasty. I chucked it up to my random experience of the day until, WHAT THE CRAP?! MORE>!?!?! We were unintentionally on a fake-hair trail!!! AWESOME!!!! And with this final piece, it was over. ...sorry, it's kinda anti-climatic. And to end: Man! Portland sure is pretty!! Still craving more Stumptown goodness? Well shit, I'm certainly not one to deprive! Kris Dresen's Report Bill Mudron's Report Jen Wang's Report The Mercury Studio Blog's Report Vera and Rich's Photo Documentary GO BACK TO MY WEBSITE, ASSHOLE